Phyllis Lubin with her dad
Phyllis Lubin with her dad
Phyllis Lubin with her dad

By Phyllis J. Lubin

 Birthdays are fun. Birthdays are an opportunity to pay homage to the person who was born on that day. It’s also an excuse to overindulge–no birthday is complete without some birthday cake! In my office, we always celebrate birthdays. One year, I was actually on track with my diet, and when I was asked what type of cake I would like, I responded that I would prefer to celebrate just with fruit. My office manager looked sad and replied, “You would deprive our office of cake?” I chuckled and never suggested that again.

In the fall, we celebrate many family birthdays. Birthday shout-outs to Lea, Rochel, and my grandson, who all have Tishrei birthdays–Lea on 6 Tishrei/September 12, Rochel on 11 Tishrei/October 5, and my grandson, Moshe Ezra (a.k.a. Maurice), who was born on the first day of Rosh Hashanah, September 25. Rabbi Wolowik from the Chabad of the Five Towns is always quick to remind everyone that only their Jewish birthday counts since we Jews were only “born once,” but I like to have any excuse to celebrate!

My dad, Donald Davidson, was born on the holiest of days: Yom Kippur! I remember my Bubby Lily (after whom Lea was named) recalling how she was already overdue when she took a drive on erev Yom Kippur with my Zayde Harold, and the bumps in the road were just enough to put her into labor. So even before he was born, my dad had to endure some bumps in the road! Yom Kippur that year fell out on September 26, so this past Sunday, we gathered to celebrate my father’s milestone. The celebration continued on September 26 itself, with lunch out with my mom, Leib, and me, and later in the week he celebrated with his friends at his weekly group at the JCC in Cedarhurst.

My father is the strongest person I know. He has persevered through many setbacks and baruch Hashem keeps on going. He has always had a lot of patience. Over the years, if I would ever complain to him about anything going on in my life, he would remind me that everything would be alright.

When I was growing up, he was there whenever I needed him. Being a college professor, he had a bit more flexibility in his schedule than the typical professional. Somehow he was always available for me. Back when I was a freshman in high school, if I ever wanted to stay for an extracurricular activity, he was there to escort me by subway and train home; as a Five Towns country bumpkin I needed assistance to navigate the Manhattan public-transportation system! (That was the last year that Yeshiva University High School for Girls–otherwise known as Central Manhattan–was located at 57th Street and 9th Avenue in Manhattan.)  When I was at Queens College, if I couldn’t manage to find a ride to school, my dad was there to transport me himself.

The concern for others never was just for family members. If he would see someone stuck on the side of the road, my dad would take the time to pull over to change a tire or give someone a lift (this was before the advent of cell phones).

My Dad is always worried about others. Whenever he finds himself in a hospital bed (sadly way too often in recent years), he always makes sure to ask the nurses and doctors their names and to thank them for everything that they do for him. He has always tried to look at the positive side of life. Even when our youngest son Yosef Binyamin was born with a disability, my dad did not treat him any differently and always had faith that he would succeed. To this day, Yussie and my dad have a special bond. Most of the time these days, no matter how much pain my dad might be in, if you ask him how he is doing, his response will be “fairly rare,” or if you ask him how he feels he will reply “with my hands.”

Happy birthday, Dad! I plan on giving you another birthday greeting on your official Yom Kippur birthday as well, and for many more years to come–until 120 and even beyond.

As we begin the High Holidays, it gives me pause to be thankful to Hashem for all that we have. May Hashem keep the world a safe place for all of its inhabitants. May we all celebrate a year full of happiness and good health, and may we enjoy many more happy birthdays for everyone.

I wish all my readers a happy and healthy sweet new year!

Phyllis Joy Lubin is an attorney with Maidenbaum & Sternberg, LLP, who resides in Cedarhurst with her husband, Leonard. They have six children–Naftali, Shoshana, Rivka, Rochel, Yosef, and Lea–and a daughter-in-law, Nina. The author welcomes your questions and comments at MothersMusings@gmail.com.

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