I’m here again. The sun is shining, the waves are relatively calm, and there are what seems like thousands of people still on the beach.
The Make-A-Wish Foundation’s Polar Bear Swim 2012 on Long Beach. We couldn’t have asked for better weather. But it wouldn’t matter either way. We were here when snow covered the sand and ice lined the boardwalk. It’s only fair that the weather is above 32 every few years!
This is my fifth Polar Bear experience. I had received an e‑mail from one of Yosef’s former physical therapists, Kathy Dillon, from our ACDS (Association for Children with Down Syndrome) years, encouraging people to support her as she dived into the water to support such an amazing organization. I decided then not only to support the organization, but to dive in myself! Since then, she has me hooked!
I actually considered not coming this year. My constant attendee for the past few years, Rochel, was already committed to the monthly Sunday Circle at Chabad. She couldn’t let Friendship Circle down, nor the kids she shadows, and I certainly supported that decision. But did I have the nerve to brave the waves all by my lonesome? I decided to at least take a ride over to the beach and to then weigh my options.
So I ventured out on my own. But I couldn’t possibly be alone with the thousands of supporters who lined the boardwalk and beach. As soon as I stepped onto the Long Beach boardwalk, I heard a familiar voice: Kathy Dillon! Fresh from her dip in the frigid winter waters, she greeted me with a huge smile. Her encouragement got me through a difficult time when Yussie was an infant, and she was here again, encouraging me in the right direction to the ocean waters, where I took a slight dip myself.
The experience at the 2008 Polar Bear swim is what inspired me to write my first column for the Five Towns Jewish Times. Not only is this the anniversary of what prompted my first column, but it is the 11th anniversary of Yosef’s lifesaving heart surgery. One thing you don’t realize when a child is born with trisomy 21 is that along with the developmental delays, there are significant health issues that are prevalent in the Down syndrome community.
Yussie was born with such a health issue. When he was only a few hours old, not only were we informed that the doctors suspected Down syndrome, we were also informed that they suspected a heart defect. Upon further testing it was determined that he had a hole in his heart (a ventricular septal defect). A hole that might close on its own in the next few months, but most likely wouldn’t. We were cautiously optimistic in those first few months. At first he was gaining weight according to schedule, but within weeks we saw his growth proceeding on a downward trend. His heart was just burning up too many calories to pump and we then began a waiting game: waiting until he was large enough, hence strong enough, to successfully survive the open-heart surgery, while watching him struggle to consume enough calories to stay afloat until then (while still not giving up hope that the hole would close on its own).
At five months of age, on February 5, 2001, the week of Parashas Beshallach, Shabbos Shirah, our newborn baby underwent his heart surgery, and it succeeded (b’li ayin hara). Maybe that is why Yussie loves to sing so much. Perhaps Moshe’s Az Yashir that week gave him the energy to thrive!

Phyllis Joy Lubin is an attorney with Rosenfeld & Maidenbaum, LLP, who resides in Cedarhurst with her husband, Leonard. They have six children: Naftali, Shoshana, Rivka, Rochel, Yosef, and Lea and now a new daughter-in-law, Nina. The author welcomes your questions and comments at MothersMusings@gmail.com.