Home Sweet Home
It usually takes place by the shul coffee station, but it can take place just about anywhere. One of my favorite places to engage with new people I meet and would like to get to know, even if only superficially, is in shul, particularly in Florida.
As you may have come to know over the past few years, we try to spend at least part of the cold, snowy New York winters down in Florida. In fact, by the time you get around to reading this issue, we will most likely be back up north in the cold waiting for some snow and figuring out a date when we can make our way back down south to the warm weather.
So, we finished Shacharis one morning last week because the gentleman sitting next to me and I had something in common. That is, we were both saying Kaddish. So, after davening, we chitchatted a bit until we got to the point about where we live, used to live, and presently reside.
I find this bit of Jewish geography as possibly one of the most intriguing aspects of this type of exchange. And sometimes during these conversations, you find out some very interesting things about people.
For instance, take last week, when the guy next to me was saying Kaddish along with me. I naturally asked him where he was from and it is very infrequent that you get a simple answer to that question down here.
He told me that he used to live in Woodmere, but nowadays he spends at least part of the year in Netanya and winters mostly down in Boynton Beach. I don’t think we got so far as to ask each other’s names, so we left it at that.
Another friendly shul neighbor informed me that he and his wife have set up their new semi-retirement lives in this manner. They spend winter here, that is, beginning after Sukkos until Pesach. They spend those two major yom tovim with their children either in Brooklyn or the Five Towns, and then from Shavuos through the summer and Rosh Hashanah, they have a home in the Catskills and that is how they divide the year.
I’m fairly certain that even though you are reading these words and think that I am way off the mark, most people have one place that they call home and that is where they reside 12 months a year. After all, as a child and then as a teen and into my early twenties, we lived in one home. And now, all of a sudden, many people that you meet begin to tell you about the multiple homes they reside in.
Let’s take a moment to mention Lakewood, which has really burst into the forefront over the last decade. People I know either moved from Brooklyn to Lakewood, or from Toronto to Lakewood, or from Monsey to Lakewood.
Then there is Jackson and Toms River, New Jersey, which are near most of the communal enclaves that have been built up within the confines of Lakewood. So why do people move to Lakewood from wherever they lived previously? Well, mostly because their children have taken up residence in that part of New Jersey.
As long as we’re on the topic of moving around, there are two other aspects of this that I should mention, otherwise I’ll leave myself open to the question as to why I failed to mention it.
In no specific order there is the wild and crazy Zohran Mamdani. The mayor-elect of New York City is rapidly turning into nothing more than a paper tiger.
To set the record straight, this Muslim has made it clear that he dislikes Israel and Jews. Part two of this subject is that as mayor, there is little or nothing he can do other than open his big mouth and display that infectious, gaping wide, sickly-looking grin.
And then it’s important to consider that at the same time the leading Muslim countries like Saudi Arabia, Kazakhstan, Syria, and even Lebanon are about to join the Abraham Accords, this hateful miscreant is trying to rally those foolish enough to follow him to adopt a position that is the exact opposite of the direction the Muslim world is taking.
Of course, everyone enjoys their privacy and it would be wrong to name the people I encountered who have this knack to be constantly on the move, going from house to house. At the same time, the names have no real value aside from the readers who may be trying to compute whether they know them or not or if they possibly went to yeshiva with this or that guy’s uncle. And if you did? Next case.
At Kiddush last weekend, I met a couple who have lived down here for just a couple of years. He’s originally from South America (possibly Argentina) and his wife was born in Israel, but lived most of her life in Brooklyn.
They are appearing in this story because after years of hopping from Argentina to Israel to Brooklyn, they decided they had enough moving around and finally decided to sell the home in Midwood and make this part of Florida their home base, and then move around between family in Argentina and Israel. In fact, they shared that this week they were heading to South America for a couple of weeks, then back to Brooklyn and the Five Towns to see some of their kids, then back to Florida again.
The state of Florida has always been a popular spot going back to our grandparents’ days. But of course, not all of them have taken up residence here because, come to think of it, even though I had two sets of grandparents for a while, I don’t think any of them visited or vacationed in Florida. Actually, I don’t think any of them vacationed at all except possibly a week or two at one of their children’s bungalows in the Catskills. Now that was a vacation! And it still might be for many today.
Florida, as you know, is back in the news in a big way. First, in the aftermath of the Covid situation and the way Governor DeSantis handled it vis-à-vis the way the blue states bungled it. And now, with the Mamdani factor, more people are likely to escape here. Like Mayor Bill de Blasio who preceded Eric Adams, Mamdani will no doubt be an extreme failure, except in his ability to scare a large part of the New York Jewish community. And he will most likely succeed in getting a large amount of people to relocate to places like Florida and Israel.
Brooklyn, with a population of about 5 million (larger than the population of some states), is home to some vibrant and extraordinary Jewish communities. Most of these people are not moving or relocating anywhere. Mamdani will do what he can to make their lives uncomfortable, but at the end of the day, he can’t do much other than talk.
For those who already have a bit of Florida in their annual schedule, some may just choose to stay here a little longer each year just to make Florida their legal residence. I believe you might need to actually reside here more than the half year or about 183 days in order to establish legal residence. For some, that is indeed worthwhile, but for others, it’s just not affordable even though you save on your New York City and state taxes.
I think we all know that our rightful home one way or another is in Israel. For most of us though, there is a varying circuitous route we need to take in order to get there. In the meantime, the ads keep flying in from both Israel and down south urging people to see one of three locations they’re advertising about properties they are offering.
Down here, there are locations that people call home. It used to be that friends would limit their Florida time to a maximum of ten days and that was it. Sure, there were those who made the trip several times a year because they could afford it or afford to be away from work so long.
People are going back to work slowly but surely. The dentists and doctors need to be in their offices to see patients. There’s no way out of that. Today, all they need to know is that you’re getting your work done.
Our newspaper bookkeeper lives in Israel. We hired a few other people, but there’s no replacement for just knowing what you’re doing. And her husband is also working for the same law firm that expected him to be there every day.
They are both at their respective desks at home each morning at 9 a.m. eastern time. When people correspond with them, what they don’t know is that for them, it’s 4 p.m. in Jerusalem.
It’s life at a different pace. It’s home sweet home.
Read more of Larry Gordon’s articles at 5TJT.com. Follow 5 Towns Jewish Times on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter for updates and live videos. Comments, questions, and suggestions are welcome at 5TJT.com and on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.
